College Graduate Juggler Gifts

I can't find a job. Can I write off the cost of my education as a tax loss?

"She's done it! The formula for work-life balance!"

"The meeting will come to order."

Interdisciplinary studies.

'I hope I run out of money before I flunk out.'

'I'm majoring in communication and minoring in pizza delivery - What about you?'

"How was work?"

"AHHHH, MORNING!"

Type A Freshman - changed courses four times, got a job, organized a protest, quit the job, plans to take second semester abroad.

'Your classroom management techniques work in practice but not in theory. That worries me.'

'What rhymes with D minus?'

'WE use these computers to gather and organise data for our school district and, on a slow day, to play solitaire.'

'The girls must be feeling better...'

"So, in conclusion, I would like to say that although I haven't actually read the book, I still found it a fascinating and enriching experience.

"I tried getting good grades without studying, but it isn't working."

"I'm returning home triumphant - do you need me to pick anything up?"

"Just tell your parents you made the grade. Don't specify."

'I'm on the short degree course... hell of a lot to pack into one year!'

"That was one of the hardest exams ever. I don't think anybody got a good grade."

"Yes, he was very nice, Mom, but he had to cut the date short because it was... 'report card time'!"

Education Guidance

Ins and Outs of Sex Therapy

"Honey! We're home!"

"Reduced budgets are a challenge...Rather than just talk you through it we'd like to give you a practical demonstration of how to 'maximise' resources from limited resources."

'Looks like someone got their bags mixed up at daycare drop-off.'

'As editor, your first job will be to rewrite your resume.'

"We interrupt this program to bring you a special message from your teachers..."

Have Horns Venn

'They aren't shy about cutting you out of the decision making process.'

'I still have time for both work and family - thanks to cloning.'

Milestone in a college student's life: 'Hey! I just got my first collection agency letter, dunning me for my credit card debt!'

'Professor McWit, crushed by an avalanche of Philosophy 101 texts, proves again that a little knowledge is a dangerous thing.'

A Man mixing up his sports.