Cold Climate Sympathizer Gifts

"Aw, geez. My nuts are frozen." "T-T-Tell me about it."

"It's not the persistent lack of sunlight or freezing temperatures that bother me - it's the crowds I can't stand."

Winter Coat Check at a Tropical Destination's Airport

"I hate this time of year."

Global Warming.

This Halloween, use props to create a unique jack-o-lanern. Fitness buffs might like a jumping jack. Or you could carve a lumberjack. In colder climates, Jack Frost might be a nice choice. And for something functional, build a jack!

'Filby, we've decided to accept your suggestion for air conditioning!'

'I have trouble believing in global warming when it's so cold that my nipples and p***s are the same size.'

'Sales meltdown...global warming...coincidence? I think not!'

'It looks like we might get some rain ahead.'

'Well, shoot. Now Uncle Hector's caught in the ice! It's enough to make you want to move to Florida.'

The science doesn't prove global warming. Stop the fraud. So why save gas because bad things "might" happen in 50 years? Global warming is hot air. Because we're going broke importing oil from countries that hate us today? Lemme see our talking points. Global warming is hot air.

'Well, put a jumper on if you're cold!'

'Congratulations on winning Weather Forecaster of the Year, you rotten swine!'

"And unlimited freezer space, naturally..."

"The cause of your illness is the approaching winter."

'...and the temperature is controlled by a thermostat which keeps it at a controlled zero year round.'

'The temperature isn't too bad at -15, but when you add on the wind chill factor... '

'Honey, I'm looking fat in white!' 'Trust me, dear. In a few months, the pounds will be melting away.'

'Yes, we could use someone with your talents!'

"I see Linda and Gay moved back from down South. I knew that wouldn't last."

'California: Here I come!'

"We switched over. It’s cheaper, and polls show sinners are far more miserable in a cold climate."

'Am I shivering or giggling?'

Igloo Building.

igloo smoking zone...

Eskimo asks, 'Was it good for you?'

You're right. Winter in Florida sounds better every year.

'The wisdom of life is to grow older in a warm climate.'

Explorer receiving a Valentine from a penguin.

"I'm so sorry, I didn't realize the water balloons had already frozen..."

"The news is getting more perplexing by the minute, but what can you do?!"

"Sure, the Antarctic waters are great feeding grounds, but can we try tropical waters next time?"

"There go the summer people, thank God."

'That's easy for you to say, you like cold weather.'