Coffee Shop Dweller Gifts

"The coffee is free, but now we rent the tables."

'Maybe you wouldn't be so penniless a writer if you stopped writing in expensive coffee shops.'

"How long have I been typing on a waffle maker."

"Do you think it's safe yet, Randy?"

"I'm a sartorial feminist."

'First we were out-gunned by the criminals...now we're out-dunked at the donut shop!'

Like, Latte. So that's a vanilla almond with soy, extra foam, whipped cream, nutmeg, and caramel. Leave room for coffee?

"So this coffee shop if your 'hangout'?"

'Excuse me, but do you have a decaffeinated baristo?'

"Those new coffee drones are really starting to get on my nerves."

Bookshop: Unpopular Economics

National Coffee Day

Decapitated coffee.

Wifi whore

How About Serving Us For a Change

Ye Old Cafe: No Coffee Today - Sore Arm!

'I'm a purist. I don't take anything in my Vanilla Mocha Dulce Latte.'

Kitty's Coffee Shop

"Guess we are going to the coffee shop!"

"When it comes to good, old-fashioned roots music, this guy is the BEST!"

'Thanks for coming out with me. I really needed a caffeine fix.'

"Soy latte for 'Actually Frankenstein is the doctor I don’t have a name.'"

"The WiFi password is: 'buysomethingorgetout'."

"There's no such thing as free wi-fi."

Starbucks doubles its sales by devising a way to sell coffee over the Internet,

'I don't get it... Our business model was exactly the same.'

"We've already had 35 people sign up for our new latte, scone and debt-consolidation loan combo. Where are you going to get all this money to loan people? Are you wearing a wire? Are you sure this is on the level? Smash your cellphone and I'll answer you."

'What do you mean, you just sell coffee? I don't understand, what kind of shop is that?'

Boss, customers are asking why you've doubled prices. I'm just being fair. When the cost of coffee beans go up, everyone thinks I'm justified in raising the price of coffee. But cost increases come in all shapes and sizes. What about my new 80" tv? What about my new car note? What about my manservant I just imported from London? I dream of the day when all costs can be passed on to customers equally. Greed is not a civil right issue!

The Coffee Tattoo

"How are your latte art classes going?"

"Six hundred Starbucks closing? Really? Is that on the East Side or West Side?"

"There you go bra. Double flat white and homage to Rothko's Seagram series."

Coffee-Rex: Even more irritable than a Tea-Rex.

Meet The People in the Bookstore Café Staring at Their Laptops 2-4 p.m.