Coffee Date Companion Gifts

Dolphin friendly tuna

"What's going on Jen? Why didn't you respond to my kissing emoji?"

Well, I see Wilcox is finally using his head...as a paperweight!

Reading the sports pages.

'Democracy? -- do you REALLY want the bars closed every election day?'

"It's an app that lets me know when I'm bored."

'My life coach traded me.'

"Talk to me. You have wounds. I have salt."

'I wish I were as popular as the coffee machine.'

Pumpkin Spice

"If you give me a penny for my thoughts, and I put my two cents in, I'll still be short a penny."

"There's no point in our being friends if you won't let me fix you."

"Thing about human interest stories is, they always presume you're interested in humans."

"Would you please sip your drink and not swill it!"

'He spent yesterday being briefed on the threats from a cyber attack...'

'How long has what been going on?'

"Don't rush me! I won't be much of a busy bee if I don't get my second cup of coffee."

'He was taller online!'

"I'm Tia Carmen...but I guess I'm not your tia, so you can just call me Carmen."

Bookworm Romance

"Don't worry about being in your 40's - before you know it, you'll be in your 50's!"

"Wow, I did not see that coming."

"I could argue about foot and mouth until the cows come home."

"Life's a binge and then you diet"

"I think I have allergies to something in this room."

"You'll have to excuse my husband Marjorie, it's his breed you know, Peeping Tom."

"Why don't I tell you a little bit about myself while you check to see if anything I'm wearing was made in a sweatshop."

"But enough about my kumquats, Carmen...tell me about you."

"The worst part of the job is dealing with people in despair, people at the end of the tether. . . and that's just my colleagues."