Cloth Repair Gifts

boy plugging leak in a barrel with his finger

Jack of all trades

"The dryer giveth and the dryer taketh away."

'My mom's the greatest surgeon this side of Mayo brothers.'

Tool Box

'I knew there was part of the pattern missing!'

The Gardener's Calendar: Try to Repair It...

"Remember now, anything is DIY-abe if you just do it yourself."

A DIY disaster.

Hardware Store Tools Wrench

"Oh no! Oh no! Oh no! Oh no!"

At the suit makers

"It's just temporary, until I fix the air conditioner."

'What's the best kind of glue to fix a TV screen?'

'Fixed the leg on the telly yet?'

"If I were a surgeon, Mr. Ferguson, which I ain't, and your car was my patient, which it ain't—except that it is, in a funny sort of way; that is, if you want to look at it like that; you know what I mean—and you was her husband, I'd have to say, 'Sir, your wife is going to need a valve job.,"

"When it comes to fixing his own computer, I call it his PDDIY project. That stands for please DON'T do it yourself."

'No, don't tell me, your electric garage door is broken.'

The world's most unemployable family

'I think I've found what's been causing my funny buzzing sounds.'

"Damn. These must have shrunk in the wash." "I don't think so."

"Take my word for it, sir―it looks just great on you!"

We micro-grafted all the hairs from the back of your head to the top and now we've completely covered your bald spot.'

Lazy plumber.

Bob’s Museum

Computer operator welding machine.

"All right, pal, I'm just saying, that's what I'd do if it was my Large Hadron Collider."

'Certainly. Here's the break-down. Seventy-five dollars for my labour. And seventy-five dollars for you impersonating a plumber.'

"Never marry an engineer."

'Your plasma screen TV needs a transfusion.'

"Fine, you win. I'll call a handyman."

"We've run all the technical stuff and found the cause of the funny sound coming from your computer."

'When last did you have your oil changed?'