Clinics Gifts

Sperm Bank, the bank that likes to say yes... yes!... YES!

"If you'd only come to me sooner I wouldn't have had to go to lunch."

"What do you want to talk about first...the kleptomania or the hoarding?"

Coming Soon - Maternity Clinic. Coming Soon After - Law Firm Dealing in Medical Malpractice.

'Now there's a vet that needs a holiday,'

"It's interpret-your-own-test-results day today."

'Sorry the doctor is running behind. You can keep today's appointment or I can fit you in tomorrow...whichever comes first.'

"You're sick of this? Just try to imagine how we feel."

'You're giving me a flu-shot? Shouldn't you be giving me an anti-flu shot?'

'I'm an extremely general practitioner.'

Man leaves sperm bank. Woman says: 'Thanks, do come again.'

"The doctor will now glance in passing at you."

'You think you have it rough. Try organizing a waiting room.'

"Psychiatric convention"

Fertility clinic open day - Man holding balloons shaped like sperm.

"I'd consider taking out this appendix you'renot using and greatly expanding your kidney area."

Doctor and nurse having a chat.

Doctor, I can't feel my legs! I know you can't, I had to amputate your arms.

"You have natural causes.''

"The reason you haven't seen me lately is because I haven't been well..."

"Actually that's not the cause of your persistent headaches."

'Level with me, Doc — it's contagious, isn't it?'

"You have twenty eight days to live."

'The lab report just came in. The lab is in fine shape!'

'Morale soared when we installed the Nurf Basketball.'

"The mood Disorders Clinic is three floors up, and then two floors down."

The Fat-Free Mayo Clinic.

Fat Reduction Clinic.

"Tick, tick, tick..."

"He seems to have done a complete turnaround."

'Oh! How nice! An espresso machine!'

'Who was that masked man?'

'I know a skirt-blower would save time, but I don't thing the patients would like it.'

Man sitting in hospital bed notices a Goldfish swimming in his Intravenous Bag.

"I'm going to take your blood pressure, so try to relax and not think about what a high reading might mean for your chances of living a long, healthy life."