Climbing Wall Warrior Gifts

"What do I do when I get to the top?"

"Things are still a little rough for me, and occasionally I lose hope and get depressed—but I'm getting stronger every day."

La Table

"If we carry them home we’ll get at least one workout."

"We're exclusively delts."

Sam's Gym. My problem is I can't get the body I want with the body I've got!

"Empty again? What's going on around here anyway?"

"He's a dedicated lifter, but he always skips leg day."

InIn by-products.

'Hey, Bob, can you get this itch on my chin? It's driving me nuts.'

Wallpapering with Nails

'You mean that I have to carry them to my car?'

'I don't get it! I've been exercising for six weeks now and haven't lost a pound.'

'Sorry, you're just not built right for weightlifting.'

'I think it's time to concentrate a little more on your upper body!'

Leaf blowers at dawn.

What's the antidote for wheat germ?

"Now we're really in trouble!!! It's the Power Walking Dead!!!"

A muscle pushing a body builders brain out of his skull.

"It's called being preemptive."

"That Melinda Alvarez thinks she's so smart! Well, I've been studying, and I'm gonna teach her a lesson on the test we have today!"

A "Park and Walk" near New York City.

"Why did we get a Cheetah? They need so much walking."

'Well, here we are again.'

'Ha! Here's your problem. You haven't been taking the human growth hormones. Someone sold you some other kind of hormone.'

I'll take this one here.

'Any improvement?' - 'Yes, my arms are getting longer.'

Spider Exhibit. It says spiders can have hundreds of children at the same time. No wonder they climb the walls! (Published originally on July 23, 2002.)

"A 15 page 'to do' list is a 'don't do' list."

'It's the people downstairs again.'

'My ex-boyfriend is just here to pick up his bodybuilding magazines. You can come in if you promise not to pick a fight.'

Gym. At some point you're going to have to raise the bar.

'Good luck son, but genetically you are screwed.'

'Office real estate' lifting weights

Whoa, you've been working out.