Climate Humor Gifts

Weatherman: "Tonight's weather forecast is confusing, followed tomorrow by downright bewildering."

'What can I do to create a climate where things get done?'

"At least, everybody's agreed about the next summit's name!"

The new green legislature requires methane mitigation.

"OK then, I admit it. Installing the log burner was a bad idea!"

Dr B orge tests his new cow-fart ozone depletion meter.

"Mum? are you sure thers's such thing as global warming, coz I'm bloody freezing."

'Who turned up the thermostat?'

"Is it safe to come out yet?"

'Where is the global warming when you want it?'

'The mountains were too cold for me you see, so I thought: People lost in the desert could need my skills too...'

"It's so warm that I'm laying hard boiled eggs."

Minnesota Weather.

'They did it again - not a word in the weather report about an ice age.'

"Venice! What will climate change think of next?"

"You'll have to have it neat, sir. We're running out of ice."

"An iceberg the size of Connecticut broke off from Antarctica? How do the taxes compare?"

US Winter Weather Map.

'This should shake things up -- I've just found conclusive evidence that global warming is caused by whales!'

Welcome to the North Pole

"Now we know what happens when we overachieve the climate goals."

"You bet I'm hot! My breed is meant to live high up in the mountains, but my owner was transferred here..."

'Unusual weather for June'

'We've only cut our CO2 emissions to piss off the utilities companies.'

To Antarctica

Chugalugs Ice Cream (Out of Business) Coming Soon: Chuglalugs Hot Chocolate

"Oh boy, the forecast is "Freezing" today, and then "Deep Freeze" for the next two days..."

"If global warming is real, then why are winters so cold?"

"Are you sure? Hot sex is a leading cause of global warming??"

'Due to global warming the Baked Alaska has been replaced by Thawed Alaska.'

Gas Cow

"Actually it started quite harmlessly... internal combustion engines were the first thing the EU banned..."

'Rats, the weather forecast is bad for the whole week: Hot and sunny...'