Clients Gifts

'Let's not be difficult about this, Mr. Pettigrew.'

"Here's what I'm gonna do."

"Whales eat billions of tiny shrimp-like creatures called krill. The krill are free but whales spend a fortune on dental floss."

"How's your insomnia?" "Bad, I can't even fall sleep during meetings."

'It's a tough call but I'm going to side with your parents, if for no other reason, because they can sue and you can't.'

'These are the end of year figures recollected in tranquility.'

'Kids, today, Xerf brought in a planet that he found. Now if we look at it closely under the microscope, you can still see it's inhabitants scrambling around.'

Opening the door to new customers

'The client has asked that you please stop referring to the product as, 'Crappy Crap Crap.'

"Don't blame me for the grade, blame Google's algorithms."

'Well, if he can't be a Minuteman, he can be a minutedog.'

'It's one of our new technology rings, it allows you to download karats.'

"I just feel like I'm constantly disappointing parents everytime I appear on report cards."

'I'm doing a school report on 'the aging process,' Dad -- can I interview you?'

'Even though you're the client, it's my duty to tell you you're wrong. . . Ok then. Speak slowly so I can write down your every whim.'

"Did you speak to our client in Australia?"

"Ed Pierce is here to see you sir, and remember, it's unprofessional to roll your eyes."

"No, Einstein's theory of relativity isn't, 'don't marry your cousin.'"

'I'll take the one on the right.'

'Furthermore, had a handrail been fitted to the wall , my client would not be sitting here now.'

"More?"

We Never Look at Prices Shop.

"Look at them over there, looking all smug with their clients and accounts and stuff."

"Getting good grades isn't enough, son. You also need to bring in new clients."

Don't forget to read the small print.

"I'm working as fast as I can, Mr. Sims. There are only so many billable hours in a day, you know."

'Pictures of your family?'

'One advantage of living through the plagues and wars of the 14th century was that you didn't have to study Chaucer.'

Let's shake on it.

What a Guy! The Tops! - "He likes to make his clients feel important."

"I love it, the chief loves it, the client loves it, but the gods don't love it."

"I didn't know they could make so many entrees with vegetables!"

"Television sets evolved from animals. My randpop remembers when they had rabbit ears!"

'Are these mushrooms or toadstools? And why are you holding a stomach pump?.'

"I'll bet Miss Parker gets teacher of the year for this."