Clean Plate Club Member Gifts

"Leftovers"

Santa Claus's wife beats the soot out of his beard.

'Wash your hands, it's time for your piano lessons.'

'I thought this was supposed to be a holiday.'

'I just finished the floors, so they better stay clean!'

Mother pours bubble bath into child's plastic pool

"Before you go anywhere, did you lick behind your ears?"

Get back in that locker room! Go on - scat! ... Anyone else forget to wash his hands?'

'I know my instruments are sterilized every day but I have no idea who does it.'

In the art gallery

"They're clean Mum, I washed them yesterday."

'No we didn't get high definition TV - the wife dusted the screen.'

'I don't care if you're wearing them again tomorrow, just put your clothes away!'

"I hate all the paperwork there is with this job."

"Sorry, but it is not negotiable! You have to let Tim clean your teeth twice a day!"

Man brushing the teeth of his reflection.

Woman disposes of partner's squash kit in hazardous waste container.

Cleaner with nameplate next to Consultant Surgeon's desk.

"Don't you just love it when they lick the plates?"

'That's why I like Neederman. He does the little things to help his team that don't show up in the statistics.'

"Let me know when the floor is clean enough for me to put my feet on it again."

'My mom invented baths!'

"Looks like you've got some competition."

'Only peanut butter and jelly fingers, Sir.'

"We might be in trouble – the environment people have cited us as a hazardous waste site."

'I'm just draining the reservoir.'

'Getting other people's toddler's leftovers on a highchair is one thing, but getting their toddler, too, is another.'

"How do you like our new smart water hose? It knows when you're dirty and hoses you off before you come into the house."

Farmed Salmon Restaurant - Everyone squashed together.

Billy's clean room.

'Coming to you direct from table nine; 'the polenta is cold'.'

I thought we agreed, this birdbath was our little secret!

Medieval Torture