Clean Kitchen Advocate Pillows

"But everybody working in the kitchen today is bald. I don't know HOW you got a hair in your food!!!"

"Where do we put Desserts?"

Santa Claus's wife beats the soot out of his beard.

Happy Knife, Happy Wife

"Compliments to the chef! Pass it on."

Grandma's caf

'I just finished the floors, so they better stay clean!'

"We needed to replace our kitchen floor and it kind of grew from there."

'It's good to see that you have a smoke detector...'

Cook in the cookery section.

"Well..I think the old Thermograph machine I rescued from work goes a treat with our kitchen units."

"Before you go anywhere, did you lick behind your ears?"

'I know my instruments are sterilized every day but I have no idea who does it.'

"This new dough-maker attachment is going to pay for itself in no time.'

In the art gallery

"All new appliances, brand new subway tile backsplash and a unique kitchen island; notice those coconuts!"

"I wonder what our self-cooking kitchen has for us today."

'No we didn't get high definition TV - the wife dusted the screen.'

"And not only do I make my own pizza sauce, I have a special way of crushing the tomatoes!"

'Don't fill up on milk and cookies.'

Thank you for the wedding present.

'At these prices can't you afford a kitchen?' Burner at the table

Tupperware Wolf

Swiss Army Stove.

Man brushing the teeth of his reflection.

"Sorry, but it is not negotiable! You have to let Tim clean your teeth twice a day!"

"Right it's decided! We are both sober for October and Stoptober. Then Movember and Decembeard and Dry January, then..."

'Ooops! No got that wrong, those two chemicals should never be mixed...'

You missed a spot!

'Chef told me I had to have guard before I used the mixer!'

'Are you sure you washed this salad?'

'Only peanut butter and jelly fingers, Sir.'

A man sprays a bug in an organic foods shop.

'My mom invented baths!'