Classic Humor Lover Gifts

A Young Man Offers A Cigar.

'Now, Mrs Althorpe, if you think you see the man who assaulted you, we just want you to touch him on the shoulder.' (Mrs Althorpe beats a man up and then says she doesn't recognise any of them)

Sisyphus, 117 million years on

'We've talked it over, and we've decided that the old-time religion is good enough for us.'

"Call this an iceberg? When I was a kid we wouldn't have called this an iceburg!"

American Gothic lol

Two men discussing the escapades of a disgruntled employee

Tantalus.

Man walking through a large sheet of glass two men are carring throught the street

18th Century man reading sign 'Peepys Show'

"Hey! I was trained in 1948 and was good enough for then, so it's good enough for now....whipper-snapper!"

Jacob Rees-Mogg

"I hope this isn't the start of an insensitive joke that was once considered funny."

'I'm so happy I could help you with your allergy to snakes, Miss Medusa!'

'My medical school believed laughter is the best medicine.

Primitive magician

"Can you juggle a household, three kids, and a career?"

'The village's oldest inhabitant? We did have one, but he died.'

Two men toting a dog in a carriage by foot, while the dog sticks his head out the window.

Uses of a Dead Cat in History: Moscow 1917

'This snuff video you sold me just shows people taking snuff.'

Peter Cook

'You must have misunderstood, dear -- I'm sure they don't sell old generals at government auctions!'

'He wanted to be remembered this way.'

'...please switch of all mobile phones, paging devices and alarm watches...'

"Why'd the chicken cross the road?"

"Ooops is a bit of an understatement, don't you think Cardigan?"

The Enemy

'I'll wait for Harold one more year. He hasn't crossed the finish line yet from the 1932 Olympic's marathon.'

"'You're the reason I crossed the road'? Really?! Is that your best pick-up line?"

Dante Alighieri

Gentleman discovering that his servants have been eating most of his good meat

'Ain't it great, Wally, to be over the hill and not under it!'

"Typical! - The Frobishers' have fire and the wheel..."

1874: Custer's Last Stand-Up