Classic Humor Enthusiast Gifts

Don Quixote attacks a windmill.

"Did you ring, Sir?"

Coin Return 25¢

"Like to see what this baby can do when I open 'er up?"

The middle-aged lady in the double-bedded room

"I always say, behind every successful man there's a woman, trying desperately to keep him away from the bar."

"Er – if you young people don't mind, I have a few things to do now. Perhaps you have a hotel or somewhere to go?"

'I'm so happy I could help you with your allergy to snakes, Miss Medusa!'

"I cross the road to forget."

"He reports to Grand Central Palace tomorrow."

"Call this an iceberg? When I was a kid we wouldn't have called this an iceburg!"

'You must have misunderstood, dear -- I'm sure they don't sell old generals at government auctions!'

'...please switch of all mobile phones, paging devices and alarm watches...'

'He wanted to be remembered this way.'

"Let that breathe a little. But not too much. My last bottle hyperventilated."

A man selling a horse to an older lady

"I hate to sound like a sergeant, Ralph, but it's ten minutes to six."

"Hey! I was trained in 1948 and was good enough for then, so it's good enough for now....whipper-snapper!"

Dante Alighieri

'Now, Mrs Althorpe, if you think you see the man who assaulted you, we just want you to touch him on the shoulder.' (Mrs Althorpe beats a man up and then says she doesn't recognise any of them)

Gentleman discovering that his servants have been eating most of his good meat

"I'd like to donate my body to comedy."

Sisyphus, 117 million years on

Buster Keaton

'Don't be ridiculous, Schaumberg! -- They didn't have Burma-Shave back then!'

"When was this license issued?"

Phil Silvers: Spot the Difference

Mother Hubbard 2011

Thatcher's child

Beware Of The Gnome - Look dear how quaint.

"What a pity! Mr Grogan took it on the lam not more than five minutes ago."

Not what he meant.

Ralph Rackstraw HMS Pinafore

"I hope this isn't the start of an insensitive joke that was once considered funny."

I'll bet with age would come wisdom, if only we would remember a @#%* thing.