Classic Country Fan Gifts

Ray Price, Willie Nelson, Merle Haggard

A cat has caught a cow which it is dragging through it's cat flap.

Songs about Texas, next 1100 miles.

"It's God's country, if your god wears camouflage and dips tobacco."

'Remember the...um...the...uh...oh, yeah...remember the Alamo!'

Red trousers at night - shepherd's delight.

'I took your advice and got a long little doggy.'

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Cockerel sings the blues...

"That was definitely mine."

"I'm putting you on country music."

Last Chance for Everything.

Towny Music Night.

A newspaper stand in a rural area.

'You had me at OOOO-AARRR!'

For every moment in life there is a song that describes it perfectly.'

"I'll be broadminded up in heaven, but here on earth you're still a whore..."

'I'll never forget the night I saw you across the crowded room of a dusty ol' honky tonk.'

"Well, the hills were alive with the sound of music...I'm sure!"

'You're stampeding yourself! You're stampeding yourself!'

"It's bad, Doc. the voices in my head are singing country western."

"What do you mean I eat as though I was born in a barn? I WAS born in a barn."

A Modern Day Cowboy and his Horse.

"The harmonica! Boy you're lucky, my cowboy plays the double-bass! I tell you what, it's a pretty awkward thing to carry around..."

"Well of course you're depressed... You're a country and western singer."

"Don't panic Daisy dear. You can relax your buttocks, it's not the vet, it's the chimney sweep."

Lawyers Ridin' The Range: 'Happy trials to you, until we meet again!'

Where the deer and the antelope play.

'The grass is always bluer to a banjo pickin bovine!'

'This next song is called Reindeer farts in my face all night.'

"I have a sweet pad and thirteen girlfriends. Can't beat a chicken's life."

A chicken coop goal.

The Invention of Country Music.

"Not tonight, hon—I've got a heartache."

Cowpunk