Classic Comedy Aficionado Gifts

Dante Alighieri

'He wanted to be remembered this way.'

'I'm so happy I could help you with your allergy to snakes, Miss Medusa!'

Primitive magician

"Can you juggle a household, three kids, and a career?"

Emergency Disguise at the CIA

Vaudeville producers audition a singing Canada goose.

Biliard Enthusiast

'You must have misunderstood, dear -- I'm sure they don't sell old generals at government auctions!'

'This snuff video you sold me just shows people taking snuff.'

'...please switch of all mobile phones, paging devices and alarm watches...'

W.C. Fields

Moon Line UP

Gentleman discovering that his servants have been eating most of his good meat

"Miss, you said that a single rabbit could reproduce a hundred times a year? What about a married rabbit?"

"No Eric, you're NOT funny haha. . . you're funny peculiar. . !"

"My great-uncle Lupe owned a barber shop! He made a lot of money!"

'We've been picking up your radio broadcasts- You must be Fibber McGee and Molly'

"This now concludes our broadcast day."

'We'll return to the evening news right after this message from the Three Stooges....'

"Is it wrong to be evasive and not answer questions?"

"I'd like to donate my body to comedy."

"Caw blimey Missus"-"He's a Carry-On Crow"

I'll bet with age would come wisdom, if only we would remember a @#%* thing.

'Don't be ridiculous, Schaumberg! -- They didn't have Burma-Shave back then!'

Jackie Gleason's Old Desk: Trays read: InOutPow, right in the kisser.

"Knock! Knock! Who's there? What, seriously? You mean you haven't installed personal security cameras?"

Buster Keaton

Tessa

Laurel and Hardy police protection - "And don't worry about informing on the mob. I've arranged that two of my men give you 24 hour proctection."

'Could you straighten my little brother out? -- he has the Trinity mixed up with the Three Stooges.'

The Wi-Fi of Bath.

Notary

'Over a hundred channels and nothing to watch!'

"Gee Hank, you've found comedy gold."