Clap-tastic Family Member Gifts

"My family clapped louder than your family!"

'William, I've decided to go back to work so I can get a little rest during the day.'

'She finds it really easy to juggle her kids with her career now she's joined the circus.'

Child laughs while making farting sound under arm. Dad says, 'Isn't it nice when they find something they're good at?

"Pay more attention to me? I'm sorry, dear, but Mommy needs you to be more specific."

"One of the advantages of working from home is the free tech support."

"Is that true, Charles? You leave your crap all over the house?"

"Your mother and I are feeling overwhelmed, so you'll have to bring yourselves up."

Woman with kids at husbands office.

'You'll never believe the day I've had...'

'I'm glad you're able to be with us more, but I'd appreciate it if you'd say you're 'spending time' with us, not 'doing time' with us.'

"This is our most difficult escape room. In here, you're a mother of 4 unruly children, tons of overdue bills and a lazy husband."

If you're happy and you know it...

"First break since 2008."

'She speaks 6 languages and can't say 'No' in any of them. . .'

'Save us!'

Believe it or not: Once upon a time Dads couldn't even boil water.

'I don't have time for throwing up.'

'Sure, I'm a working mother - is there any other kind?'

Baby On Boardroom

Couple who have confused their baby's pram and the lawn mower.

If Dr. Chan has a schoolteacher husband, a diabetic mother-in-law, twins in preschool, and a daughter who stays with her father across town on alternate weekends, and one twin and the daughter have colds, how many free rapid COVID tests are required to alleviate Dr. Chan's breaking-point levels of despair?

A family trying to make a child smile for a photo

Balancing Family and Work

'Don't worry about gaining weight after the baby - You'll run it off during the toddler years.'

'So, paternity leave problem solved then?'

'Hurry up you guys! I'm about to serve dinner!'

"This one is perfect for Thanksgiving. It comes prestained in cranberry sauce, gravy and pumpkin pie."

'We're the parents. What we say goes. . . In one ear and out the other.'

"I adore kids, but I also adore Netflix."

"I never had to choose between a baby and a career—I'm a surrogate mother."

"How she's able to manage a career and still juggle her family, I'll never know."

Work/Personal Life Balance Beam

Beyond Dante