Claim Skeptic Gifts

'We've been seeing a lot of this type of injury lately.'

'Seriously, in this day and age, how can people still believe in this nonsense that we have evolved from microbes...?'

Non-Creative Writing, Also Known as Plagiarism 101.

Alternative Medicine

"I've edited your Wikipedia entry again, Sadie. You're about to be inundated with phone calls from the press." "Whatever, geek-boy." "You're now the world's foremost authority on Turkey leprosy, the disease that's threatening to ruin the holidays." "No one'll believe that." "Oh yeah? I wrote a Wikipedia page for Turkey leprosy, too, along with examples of all the historical figures it's killed, such as the Archduke of Crushistan." "There is no 'Crushistan.'" "I've written a Wikipedia entry for C

'A 'D' in physics and biology, an 'A' in reading aloud. What will ever become of this kid?'

"I understand the allure of religion. It offers hope in a world that's often cruel and unfair. But religion's promises have been consistently proven false. Science, on the other hand, has actually delivered the things that improve human life...."

10 Commandments in the Supreme Court (USA)

"If we evolved from stupid people, why are there stupid people still around?"

"I may have wasted my life, but at least I don't look stupid."

The contract was not worth the paper it was written on, which considering the paper was not a good sign.

First clue that the latest medical breakthrough isn't quite there yet - 'Don't worry, I had the same thing...'

"I'm starting to prefer the ones who don't believe in me."

"If they de-regulate this place, we wouldn't have to do all those boring scientific tests."

"What I like about intelligent design is that it explains everything will proving nothing."

In a career limiting move, Reginald decided to give Albert's latest theory some frank and fearless feedback.

'I was born with math immunity, so I'm special. I know that.'

"I totally meant to do that."

"Solar flares may be a contributing factor or perhaps it's a negative vibe sensitivity...."

GOP presidental candidates on science!: 'Billions for astrollogers! Zero for astronomers!' s

'It's just a conspiracy by scientists to get funding.'

"Huh! Never a miracle vaccine when you want one - then three come along at the same time - bloody typical!"

Documentation Please

Science deniers Soc.

"Social service teams are claiming that they can't recruit workers because of the vicious, biased reports we write about them!"

"Recent studies now show that people who use the aphorism ‘whatever doesn’t kill you makes you stronger’ have compromised immune systems."

"Dad just told me a weird stork story. He must be a creationist."

'Mrs. Tomkins says her prescription has no side effects, so it can't be doing her any good.'

"The drug has, however, proved more effective than traditional psychoanalysis."

"Delusional scientific elitist..."

'As we now know, there are no such things as viruses.'

RFK Jr Anti-Vax