City Living Advocate Gifts

Coming soon - Phase Two: More of the same.

"Tight......this isn't tight...now a New York City apartment......that's tight."

'Sparky, fetch me an impudent little chardonnay.'

"The fish sticks here are very good."

"The woman on the fire escape who acted like it was a balcony"

"We're airship people, not mega-airship people."

Hoodie Hang-out

'Looks like Reginald wasn't kidding when he said he's going to start urban farming on the roof...'

Lift buttons read: East Side/West Side/All Around the Town.

'I'm telling ya, it's a jungle out there.'

Can't even hold signs well.

Sick Building Syndrome

"1. Flimsig used pallets, old foam 2. Stinkum goat wool 3. Beetup recycled lumber 4. Riskig kerosene lamp 5. Stupor hand blown by Nils 6. Smokum found on beach in Mendocino 7. Woblig 100% driftwood"

"Son, one day two hundred square feet of this city could be yours to rent."

'It's not easy to get one of these - before that you have to have found a parking space!'

"I like New York, but I miss sleeping drunk on my front lawn."

"And what do you think of the government's record on housing?"

From Here You Can See Bugger All

Doubledecker bus stop

'I don't think we can justify employing a gardener.'

Homeless count.

'I should've never sold my truck when I moved to the city.'

'This is close enough.'

"Oh dear! Low-cost housing."

Leaves falling from a roof garden.

"That pigeon's at it again."

"I told you never to call me here."

'It's like having our own private luxury box in the game of life.'

"And then the three bears were slowly forced out of the neighborhood due to major corporations cornering the market—The once cozy cottage is now an Air B&B." "The end."

House hunting is cruel.

'New in town, hey? Let me show you a great condo tower.'

Paving over the window-box

Sculptor explaining to tourist in Trafalgar Square that sculpture of pigeon is called 'Retribution - it actually doubles as a giant privy!'

"Here's my plan. We grow our roots for 30 years until they crack the cement, which dismantles the fence. Then we just push it ove and make a break for it. You in?"

"Did you order takeout?"