Cigarette Satirist Gifts

'You can have a last cigarette, but I must warn you, they can shorten your life.'

Small country advertisng at the Olympics

Smokers smoking on the moon, Astronauts smoking on the moon

'our chances seemed pretty good until you lighted that 20.'

"My new year resolutions were to continue eating, drinking, smoking and gambling...and I've stuck to all of them!"

"I see, Mr. Pipkins, we're back on the bourbon and smoking through glazed doughnuts."

"I'm afraid the umbrella constitutes an enclosed space and must be taken down."

Safety first - be aware of what is around you.

"More ashtray, nurse! For God's sake, more ashtray!"

'Let's play some cards, boys. Oh, and by the way, the wife said if we figure out how to light these cigars we can smoke in the bowl.'

"I only allow myself one after a meal - I'm now down to 43 meals a day!"

'Excuse me,sir-those wouldn't happen to be your cigarette butts,would they?'

'Why can't you just chew bones like other dogs?' (dog smoking pipe).

"That's why you don't smoke near the dang cannon!"

'If you want to smoke, you'll have to go outside.'

'Well actually, the only reason I put my head out of the window is that Master smokes while driving...'

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"He said if we don't let him in, he'll huff and he'll puff and he'll fill up our whole house with cigar smoke."

'Well the dog's been passively smoking our fags for the past ten years, so I think it's only fair that he has a nicotene patch too.'

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"We think he picked it up at the kennel."

Tim's hopes for his safer smoking device were to be dashed when it failed to fit through the door...

"Smoking causes cancer in humans. I'm canine."

Warning.

''Stop smoking'? -- but my psychiatrist just told me to start!'

Prehistoric Cigarette Lighter

Grumpy man telling a teddy bear whoes watching TV to get out of his chair

'Smoking or non-smoking?'

Fish "Hey Kid, got a light?"

'I used to be a pack animal. Lately, I've become a two pack animal.'

"See? Right there - it says bubblegum."

What? Why the heck not?

"You should have mentioned in your resume that you could only do it once."

'It's a filthy and nasty habit, but at least, you won't end up with yellow teeth...'

Snowman