Smoker Satire Gifts

Fish of various sizes, arranged in ascending order, smoke cigars.

Smokers smoking on the moon, Astronauts smoking on the moon

"Since I've gone over to roll-ups I find I can get by on just one cigarette a day!"

"My new year resolutions were to continue eating, drinking, smoking and gambling...and I've stuck to all of them!"

'our chances seemed pretty good until you lighted that 20.'

"I'm afraid the umbrella constitutes an enclosed space and must be taken down."

"More ashtray, nurse! For God's sake, more ashtray!"

'Which dog is named 'BOGART'?'

'Let's play some cards, boys. Oh, and by the way, the wife said if we figure out how to light these cigars we can smoke in the bowl.'

"I only allow myself one after a meal - I'm now down to 43 meals a day!"

'Why can't you just chew bones like other dogs?' (dog smoking pipe).

'Well actually, the only reason I put my head out of the window is that Master smokes while driving...'

'If you want to smoke, you'll have to go outside.'

"That's why you don't smoke near the dang cannon!"

Identity Parade - Smoker.

"He said if we don't let him in, he'll huff and he'll puff and he'll fill up our whole house with cigar smoke."

Snatching Failure from the Jaws of Success

'I used to be a pack animal. Lately, I've become a two pack animal.'

Cigarettes $7.50 - Ask About Our Easy Payment Plan.

Fish "Hey Kid, got a light?"

Grumpy man telling a teddy bear whoes watching TV to get out of his chair

'Smoking or non-smoking?'

"We think he picked it up at the kennel."

Tim's hopes for his safer smoking device were to be dashed when it failed to fit through the door...

Prehistoric Cigarette Lighter

''Stop smoking'? -- but my psychiatrist just told me to start!'

'It's a filthy and nasty habit, but at least, you won't end up with yellow teeth...'

Smoking and non-smoking sides of a Volcano.

Casino - featuring pre-owned cigarette smoke.

'The ones who smoke, masturbate... the ones who don't smoke, masturbate... is this a study on smoking or masturbation?'

If they ban smoking in cars...

"You should have mentioned in your resume that you could only do it once."

Snowman

"See? Right there - it says bubblegum."

'I roll my own E-cigarettes."