Church Comedy Lover Gifts

Frankenstein's Monster in Church - "Welcome friends to the Church of the Born Again Christians,"

'Well, well -- this IS a surprise witness!'

'Holy-Kanoly' makes his infamous 'Leap-of-Faith' jump.

"Call me 'pops' one more time and I'll lace 'ya one!"

Monk Prompt

"Can the folks in the nose-bleed section hear me alright?!"

How's my sermon. . .

Bishops Snooker

The ten ammendments

"...and in conclusion..."

"It would be great if you could turn the smoke machine down a little during worship..."

'I noticed you don't sleep during the sermons anymore.'

The Sleeping Congregation.

'Even More Disciples'

'The good stuff is here, under the counter.'

"The whole neighborhood has an opinion on who the next pope should be."

"Remember that it is easier for a camel to pass through the eye of a needle than for a rich man to enter the Kingdom of Heaven

"Only three hundred and sixty-seven followers? Maria's not an asset to the abbey."

'I really don't need to go to church, Reverend -- I feel guilty enough without it.'

'To avoid possible schism, a period of careful reflection is needed before changing the light-bulb.'

Finger puppets in church.

Church restrooms

Pastor puts up sign on pole stating that he is 'serving' his 1,000th sermon.

'Funny in my day they all looked like WInston Churchill.'

'But, apart from the pews, the sermon, the hymns, the coffee and, 'all that praying', you'd come again?'

Minister Starts at a New Church

Next Sunday - Rap Mass! 'I thought we reached the limit when we had that jazz mass.'

'If you're a nun, where's your nunchucks?'

First Church - New Policy: To avoid lawsuits, Rev. Loomis' sermons no longer mention sinners by name.

Applause

"Wake up! Brother Billy's finished praying."

"A real old fashioned fire and brimstone message today Preacher."

Delivery of Sermon within 30 minutes or your second one's FREE!

Church Parking Space Reserved For Sinner Of The Week

'I hear he has a reputation as a loose Canon.'