Christian Wedding Gifts

"Turning the water into wine was amazing, now how about some fruit punch for the kids."

You're my Mona Lisa.

Demure lady with gloves

Lesbian civil partnership.

Heart surgeon tastooing patients heart with "Love".

When Ted and Nancy would dance, it was as if they were the only couple on the floor....

"Do you, Darlene, take Jim to be your lawfully wedded husband, when you could, clearly, do far better?"

'Of course I'll still love you when you're old and skinny!'

'She's a very protectice mother!' - Lifeguard at Christening/Baptism.

"We stumbled onto a house - and both of us being young and in love and quick to grasp the situation - "

'Now I kinda wish we had planned a bigger wedding.'

"The water changes them back into babies. I think they call it the Fountain of Youth."

'Oh my God. I love it!'

'Do you think it might be possible that what you wear could be a contributing factor to your relationship problems?'

"Stepping on the gown never works. They run faster without it."

"You may now kiss the bride..."

I must say a winter wedding certainly saves on confetti!'

"I said he's beginning to teethe...not tithe."

"You're the lid to my pot."

A heart shaped cake

"Thanks to my wedding planner, everyone in the wedding is still talking to each other."

"Will you stand by him through humiliating revelation after humiliating revelation, and then-once you're sure it couldn't possibly get any worse-when even more humiliating revelations come to light?"

'Do you promise to love, honor and remain co-dependent until death do you part?'

"And do you, Deborah Tannen, think they know what they're talking about?"

"Do you promise to love, honour and contribute to the gross national product?"

"It was years ago, for a nature documentary, and they said it was going to be very artistic."

'Well, he actually behaved pretty well for the first few minutes of the wedding ceremony....'

'They all laughed when I told them that I was going to marry a magician.'

Wedding Day Itinerary.

"She can walk the walk, but can she talk the talk?"

"It started with a mutual interest in martial arts and developed into an interest in marital arts."

We'll have Manhattans...

Red Letter Days - A declaration of love in public

"The wedding cake as holy sacrament"

"They met in the express-checkout lane at the A.&P. and have slowed down only occasionally ever since."