Chiropracty Gifts

'I told you nothing was out of joint but your nose.'

'...I already have 26 cats, why not 27...'

'I believe we've located the cause of your back problem, Mrs. Kangaroo.'

'Can we afford you to save us money by repairing the car yourself...?'

"I'd like a new tire for my 1976 Chevy Chevette."

"I scream! You scream! I can't stop the screaming!"

Emergency numbers on a telephone.

"I stand corrected."

Jesus's First and Less-Heralded Miracle Walk,

'This is your spinal column...It's a bunch of bones that runs up and down your back and keeps your legs from going all the way up to your neck.'

'Motherhood is great, but I get a really sore back...'

"You pulled most of the muscles in your back lifting your to-do list? You've got a bigger problem than pulled muscles."

CLEAR!

"Stacked coffee cups look like a spine. This is why the more coffee you drink, the easier it is to stand up and keep yourself awake."

'I tell you what: If it weren't for the headrest, I would have serious whiplash right now...'

Traditional vs alternative medicine.

Egyptian chiropractor.

The Small Business Advisor: 'The first bit of advice I'd give you for your garage start-up is to tell your dad'

"Tell me why you think people are out to get you."

'Okay, I'm going to make the phone ring just once, and I want you to refrain from picking up. Bite the towel if you have to.

When Tia Carmen says... "A smooth sea never made a skilled mariner" it means "I can fix it with a hammer."

'I beleive I have a new approach to psychotherapy, but, like everything else, the FDA tells me it first has to be tested on mice.'

'I just invented the 'chair' - It relieves lower back pain!'

If all else falls...Mom's Chicken Soup

"Good news...turns out it was just your battery!"

'While doing the ' Hoxey-Pokey' I put my right hip in...I put my right hip out, and rhat's where it stayed!'

"It's just a hunch, but you spend a lot time at your computer, don't you?"

Joint Ventures!

"Whiplash..."

"Do you know a good chiropractor?"

'Dear, the good doctor appears to have misplaced my file. Can you fax over your copy?'

'You said I should check back with you if I didn't get any better. . .'

'I have to admit I was skeptical at first, but their hooves are magical, Magical, I say!'

"I don't think the crackling sound coming from your lower back is as serious as you thought. Just relax and I'll have this Rice Krispie Square out of your back pocket in no time."

Cowboy at mechanic with horse hoisted