Children Of Friends Gifts

'The prince and the princess lived happily ever after on their profits from capital-appreciation funds.'

'The Fourth of July would be a lot more fun if school weren't out anyway.'

"Can we do that again tomorrow night?"

A young Don King

"I think the most rewarding part of caring for elderly parents is when they call you because they don't want to bother the 9-1-1 people."

I will study my speling words...

'Ahhh...'

'What the... MOM! This isn't deer! It's a yucky tourist again!!'

'X is unknown? Even to somebody with all your education?'

"He's not talking yet, but sometimes we give him peanut butter to make it look like he is."

'Still having a hard time finding day care?'

"What do you think I can get for it on the blackboard market?"

Timmy had one heck of a security blanket.

"I give up. Where's the power button?"

My book report is based on the audio book of the same name.

(When I'm good I'm very very good, but when I'm bad I'm... Well….) (Horrid?)

Twenty-first century baby walker

'Well,he certainly has his father's nose!'

'Don't leave baby alone with this really cool tiny phone. It's a choking hazard.'

"Bad things happen to people who don't buy my cookies, Sir."

WELCOME TO KINDERGARTEN!, 'Boy, talk about psychobabbl!'

'In Show and Tell today, I showed my birthmark! I got expelled!'

'I know what you're thinking, are those legal shoes.'

"Some school - They teach us about the Fifth Amendment, but they won't let us use it on TESTS!"

Young Gums

"I'm exempt from the company fitness program. I have triplets at home."

"I wish they'd never discovered fertility drugs!"

'Look. Billy Curry did a nude!'

'Still having problems finding a baby sitter?'

'You still owe me the pony from last year!'

Boys making skis from bits of fence.

'Wanna see my tadpole collection?'

Kid to kid: 'I can't be wearing out my welcome. I didn't even step on it.'

Bouncing baby

"11th Grade Math for Nincompoops"