Childhood Comedians Gifts

The cootie code!

"Chocolate? I can't be allergic to chocolate! I'm a kid, can't you say I'm allergic to spinach or broccoli?"

Boy bringing home an octopus in a fish bowl.

Emotion of Mr. Kenwigs on hearing the family news from Nicholas

One of the Three Little Pigs reaches puberty.

"Here's our little bundle of joy."

"Oh look—he fell asleep when you told me about your day."

'Think about it guys: We're fed and sheltered, why would we ever think about leaving the nest?'

'Who ever came up with the idea that throwing up is fun?'

"We can speak freely now. I've encrypted the line."

'Let's play doctor - I'll listen to your heart and you give me all your allowance.'

Their father would frequently have to barge in and pantomime to his kids that they were not being quiet enough as they pantomimed actual noisy children.

A Grade Two student explains why he is so eager to get back to school.

"I'm looking forward to the next thirty five years of her living with us."

"I'm hoping for a pardon from the Governor."

"We're neither software nor hardware. We're your parents."

'Grownups are stupid! How can you be good and have fun?'

'Do you think Mum and Dad are trying to keep an eye on us, by enroling on the same university course as us, Colin?'

'Glue will wreak havoc on your arteries.'

"My parents are members of a tiny cult that worships me."

"Our little girl has blossomed into quite the little complainer."

'My imaginary playmate squealed on me!'

'You don't either have a date with Dora the Explorer!'

'Going my way, gorgeous?'

"I'm the Grin Reaper."

Kid to other: 'It's been a crazy day. I caught a bug and tossed my cookies.'

Baby thinks: I smile, they smile. I laugh, they laugh. I think they're teachable!

Stand up comedy for four-year-olds.

"So, what are you doing for the rest of your life?..."

A smart alec boy

"I want you both to know that I'm unhappy about the way things are run around here, and there are going to be some changes made..."