Kiddie Comedians Gifts

'Glue will wreak havoc on your arteries.'

Boy bringing home an octopus in a fish bowl.

Emotion of Mr. Kenwigs on hearing the family news from Nicholas

Human Behavior Institute. Out Experiencing Lunch.

"Here's our little bundle of joy."

"Oh look—he fell asleep when you told me about your day."

'Think about it guys: We're fed and sheltered, why would we ever think about leaving the nest?'

"We can speak freely now. I've encrypted the line."

"I'm looking forward to the next thirty five years of her living with us."

Their father would frequently have to barge in and pantomime to his kids that they were not being quiet enough as they pantomimed actual noisy children.

"We're neither software nor hardware. We're your parents."

'I kinda did.'

'Going my way, gorgeous?'

'It's a new record, mom - there are six of us in here!'

'You don't either have a date with Dora the Explorer!'

'Do you think Mum and Dad are trying to keep an eye on us, by enroling on the same university course as us, Colin?'

"Our little girl has blossomed into quite the little complainer."

"My parents are members of a tiny cult that worships me."

Kid to other: 'It's been a crazy day. I caught a bug and tossed my cookies.'

"I want you both to know that I'm unhappy about the way things are run around here, and there are going to be some changes made..."

Baby thinks: I smile, they smile. I laugh, they laugh. I think they're teachable!

What will be the worst part about your first semester of college being online classes only? My little brother will be my freshman year roommate!

'Don't chew your food.'

"Yes, I can see the excitement in Young Master's eyes and I can smell fear in Master and Mistress: looks like the school holidays are coming..."

"I hate when this happens."

'I'm a loaf of bread.'

A smart alec boy

Groom carries bride across threshold, goes back to carry in mother-in-law.

"It's your turn to change his diaper!"

"So, what are you doing for the rest of your life?..."

"I guess we'd be considered a family. We're living together, we love each other, and we haven't eaten the children yet."

"Your mother and I have seen your report card, and we've decided to distance ourselves from you."

'What they ought to send up in the space shot is broccoli!'

"Doesn't Dad know about child labor laws?"

"Every time my grandma comes over she squeezes my cheek...I think that's what they call the old age pinchin'!"