Childhood Chaos Enthusiast Pillows

"Listen up and listen up good, 'cause I'm only going to say this a million times."

'Actually, they're pretty nice, once they settle down.'

'Hi hon! How's the little monster?'

"I need to know who started it."

"But if I don't break stuff who will?"

"I thought it would be nice if we had a forum where we could get together and have screaming tantrums."

'Mom! -- Jeffrey's having a wardrobe malfunction!'

'Look, Dad, I made a pair of boots out of your chest waders.'

The Queen of Static Electricity: 'Hey, Jeffrey...I've got a physics question for you...The queen of static electricity is exempt! Hail me!!'

"Everyone says she has the clutter of someone twice her age."

'No, that wasn't your mother calling to ask if you were okay. That was your mother calling to ask if I was okay.'

"She was right -- Her teddy bear did squish your action figure!"

"Instead of taking a bath couldn't I just run through a carwash?"

Two children play with a pedal bin

"The children took off their own coats this morning, Pastor."

'Just wait until I'm introduced to carbonated beverages!'

'Let's just keep quiet about this, and maybe some terrorist group will claim credit.'

"Can't you just relax and enjoy my childhood."

'Twiiiiiiiiins!!!!'

'How many kids do you actually have?'

"Well? Have I hit it yet?"

"And I suppose cleaning up after yourself just once would in some way stifle your precious creativity."

Baby with a full diaper 'Load Rage'

'Found her. Keeping her.'

'You don't mind distractions as much as me, so I didn't think you'd mind if my kids played in your office today.'

"I think our bundle of joy needs his mommy, dear!"

Feeding the baby

"Normally things don't get me down. But lately, just getting out of bed has been difficult."

"Well, could you give me a ballpark number?"

"It was a mistake to let the children chose their own instruments for the new music class...I have eleven cymbals, and Billy Fitzgerald chose the bagpipes!"

'I couldn't put it down... I had peanut butter on my hands.'

I've fallen and I refuse to get up! Medical Alert System for Toddlers.

Paint fight art!

'We need another refrigerator, Mom.'

Supermom meets her match - super kid.