Childhood Chaos Aficionado Pillows

'It's called 'Oh Bugger It!' if you must know!'

'Hi hon! How's the little monster?'

"Have mercy on me, Mama. Have mercy on Mr. Pitiful."

"I need to know who started it."

"But if I don't break stuff who will?"

"I thought it would be nice if we had a forum where we could get together and have screaming tantrums."

'Mom! -- Jeffrey's having a wardrobe malfunction!'

'No, that wasn't your mother calling to ask if you were okay. That was your mother calling to ask if I was okay.'

"She was right -- Her teddy bear did squish your action figure!"

'Marm doesn't understand, 'I've got it, I've got it'.'

"The children took off their own coats this morning, Pastor."

Two children play with a pedal bin

'Actually, they're pretty nice, once they settle down.'

It's all gravy.

'Just wait until I'm introduced to carbonated beverages!'

"Listen up and listen up good, 'cause I'm only going to say this a million times."

'Twiiiiiiiiins!!!!'

'Let's just keep quiet about this, and maybe some terrorist group will claim credit.'

"Can't you just relax and enjoy my childhood."

'How many kids do you actually have?'

Baby with a full diaper 'Load Rage'

"I think our bundle of joy needs his mommy, dear!"

'Found her. Keeping her.'

"Well, could you give me a ballpark number?"

'You don't mind distractions as much as me, so I didn't think you'd mind if my kids played in your office today.'

"Normally things don't get me down. But lately, just getting out of bed has been difficult."

'I couldn't put it down... I had peanut butter on my hands.'

'We need another refrigerator, Mom.'

Nerve-racking Chanukah moments

'Surprise!'

"Honey, all we want is what's quiet for us."

Supermom meets her match - super kid.

"If he's a little bundle of joy, shouldn't he be laughing?"