Childhood Chaos Fan Pillows

'Just wait until I'm introduced to carbonated beverages!'

'They don't understand goo-goo-gah-gah. Dumb it down to WHAAAAAH!'

'and on the Kids' Menu, we have Cranky Pants French Toast...'

Family with pets.

"Your mother and I are feeling overwhelmed, so you'll have to bring yourselves up."

"But if I don't break stuff who will?"

"I thought it would be nice if we had a forum where we could get together and have screaming tantrums."

"Everyone says she has the clutter of someone twice her age."

'No, that wasn't your mother calling to ask if you were okay. That was your mother calling to ask if I was okay.'

"She was right -- Her teddy bear did squish your action figure!"

'We're playing trampoline, mom.'

"Instead of taking a bath couldn't I just run through a carwash?"

"The children took off their own coats this morning, Pastor."

"I'm tired of this full-time job. I want a part-time job."

'Actually, they're pretty nice, once they settle down.'

'None of the other things had instructions.'

"Listen up and listen up good, 'cause I'm only going to say this a million times."

"Can't you just relax and enjoy my childhood."

'Let's just keep quiet about this, and maybe some terrorist group will claim credit.'

"Well, could you give me a ballpark number?"

'You don't mind distractions as much as me, so I didn't think you'd mind if my kids played in your office today.'

'I couldn't put it down... I had peanut butter on my hands.'

'You'd better clear out some rooms, nurse. He jumped off a bridge, and all his friends are behind him.'

"One day, son, all this will be....Never mind."

"I downloaded the Laugh Track app yo soften mom when I give her my lame excuse."

'It's a leaf.'

'My room's in a terrible state, Mum's just cleaned it.'

A chaos of kids

I'm beginning to see why they call these SELF-inking stamps'

'For heaven's sake, couldn't you have spelled it out?'