Child Rearing Champion T-Shirts

'Honestly, they grow so quickly these days.'

"Can I borrow the car keys?"

'The child is very illogical'

"No wonder babies are born screaming. I haven't had a wink of sleep since the exit light came on!"

A kangeroo and it's baby read books about understanding each other.

Fitness Programme for babies

"I won it for being the most noncompetitive in preschool."

A Tit for Tat.

Janey then realized that babysitting isn't easy...

"Having nannies really changes you."

'Honey, what's wrong?! Why are you crying?'

Mother pushes twins on a double-decker swing.

Mother racing to work for a company with day care and a health club.

The First Day Back

"It's childhood. Your child has childhood."

'If you don't behave we'll unfreeze your stem cells!'

Fathers are Heroes

"I can always tell when the kids go back to school. Everyone is so happy and relaxed."

'Is that why our games of hide and seek are over so quickly?'

'Mother will catch you!'

'He's got his shoes on the wrong feet again.'

'I haven't been campaigning for a creche all these years for nothing - you're going!'

"Oh please, go on, just for the weekend."

"Being a mum is a full-time job."

Mind them while I go shopping and I'll give you 50 bucks extra!

'When the bough broke, did the daycare center's insurance rates go up?'

"Where would young families be without grandparents as unpaid childminders?"

"GP or chemist? To be on the safe side let's go to A and E."

"Honey, your head's through the armhole again."

'I came untucked.'

'Do you have a reservation?'

Father's Day

"Before we begin the hymn of thanksgiving, I'd like each of you mothers to take a moment to count her little blessings."

'What I like most about my mom is that she always supersizes her hugs.'

'You like that? Okay, ONE MORE TIME! The wheels on the bus go round and round!...'