Child Achievement Gifts

That's my son

"Finally, after years of work, irrefutable proof that I'm a nerd."

'And this year's 'Inquisitive Learner Award' goes to...'

'Mom, Dad! Look what I created in lab today!'

'You must be very proud Daphne.'

"This could be the year someone actually goes up there."

"How was work?"

"This is not the first time I have been asked to speak."

"I lettered in spelling."

GCSEs

'I wrote a software program and sold it for two million dollars.'

"One day, I'll be the first woman!"

In addition to brilliant grades and perfect SATs � Parents' night. College admissions. Your child should excel at 3 sports and lead a school extra-curricular like the newspaper. Don't the arts count? Sure! If your child sings, for example � A part on 'Glee' or in the Metropolitan Opera would certainly help. Our kids are doomed.

Science Fair Judgements

"And in the category of 'The Most Amazing Comeback from an Academic Nosedive,' the winner is..."

Pipe Smoker of the Year Awards.

"He's my school project for science class."

Achiever: An illustration of how many thoughts she can have in a split second, while still listening to him.

"I got an 'A' for my anti-gravity science project!"

Jumping Man

Presentation: Any questions?

Annual Mensa Convention: 'Ok, who's the genius who forgot to send out the invitations?'

It's a letter from Tim. He claims his grades are improving and he might even make the DEEN's list.

"No, I'm not the first in my family to attend college. But I am the first at an Ivy."

First Prize!

"My mom's getting me a tutor. That's kind of a personal trainer for the brain."

"Gracie, I'm so proud that you made the academic decathlon team! Here...have some of my special green tea! Ithelps you concentrate and improves your memory!"

"They called me Dumbo. A memoir of redemption."

"The chairman said he wanted to see you when you got out of hospital."

'I'm not experienced, but I have a PhD in Byzantine history.'

'F.G.G. First Grade Graduate.'

'Every day son, I feel on top of the World!'

"I got the highest grade in the class, except the giraffe."

Ant holds up the word 'TRIUMPH'.

"I started out on a molehill - What about you?"