School Achievement Gifts

Parrot School Report - "Poor attendance record, always sick....well done son."

'It's a discipline note form my teacher. I solved the math problems in my head and I was supposed to use a calculator.'

'I wrote a software program and sold it for two million dollars.'

"We're proud that Jeremy is a budding artist. He got 'A' in a class for downloading clip art."

'So what is the consulting that you got an 'A' for?'

"I got the highest grade in the class, except the giraffe."

"He's my school project for science class."

I should be a writer when I grow up...

"Finally, after years of work, irrefutable proof that I'm a nerd."

'Mom, Dad! Look what I created in lab today!'

"This could be the year someone actually goes up there."

'You must be very proud Daphne.'

"Can you change this quiz grade from an A to a C? I like to keep expectations low until I blow my parents' mind by acing the final exam."

'I'm not happy with his latest school photo.'

"How was work?"

"This is not the first time I have been asked to speak."

GCSEs

"I lettered in spelling."

"One day, I'll be the first woman!"

"And in the category of 'The Most Amazing Comeback from an Academic Nosedive,' the winner is..."

Achiever: An illustration of how many thoughts she can have in a split second, while still listening to him.

"Where are redactions when you need them?"

"I got an 'A' for my anti-gravity science project!"

Science Fair Judgements

Presentation: Any questions?

First Prize!

Annual Mensa Convention: 'Ok, who's the genius who forgot to send out the invitations?'

It's a letter from Tim. He claims his grades are improving and he might even make the DEEN's list.

"My mom's getting me a tutor. That's kind of a personal trainer for the brain."

"They called me Dumbo. A memoir of redemption."

'Oh, Christ.'

"I see you got an A+++ in science."

"The chairman said he wanted to see you when you got out of hospital."

"First let me say that your father and I really, really wanted to like your performance."

'I'm not experienced, but I have a PhD in Byzantine history.'