Chemistry Comedian Gifts

'Sorry Professor, you're right: I DID skip a line of the instructions...'

The Solar System (after deregulation)

"Frankly, I can't wait until I evolve into a bird..."

Carbon Dating.

'According to creation mathematicians, all of Euclid's theories were originally found etched into rocks.'

"Sorry mum, but I just don't get the decimal system..."

Chemist builds animals instead of molecular models

She loves to play with string theory.

"You're calling it love, but it's really just static electricity."

'OOO, I've thought of a new one! Two squiggles and a backwards G!'

"Professor, we need you to stop. The Student Union has decided that the earth is flat."

PET THEORIES

"See? A huge surge in all the major crowdfunding sites right before the Big Bang!"

"And now, speaking against the theory of evolution..."

"Pssst! - Gerald, you've mutated again. . ."

Dr. Saltine, pioneer of salt transplants.

How Glaciations Begin

"And what qualifications do you bring to the table beyond being first in line?"

'Since Fleming already beat you to it with penicillin, I take it we can dispose of your week-old sandwich?'

'There are two types of alchemy - there's organic and there's inorganic.'

The new Physics

'In the alternate universe I've come up with, everything would be exactly the same except cats would bark.'

'He's majoring in cave hydrology with, obviously, the ultimate aim of being a caveman like his Dad.'

'Who says you're not genetically manipulated?'

'Interesting article in Nature this week - apparently love's not a wave, it's a particle.'

"Of course you can't put your finger on it. It's a hypothetical particle."

Evolution...the dandy lion.

Evolving/Devolving

Table Of The Elephants

Evolution...the wifi rhino.

They still don't get it, do they? They can't see we're aping them!

Complex equation results in the conclusion that cats are better than dogs.

Dr Ed Henderson demonstrates that it IS possible for someone to become too familiar with the safety rules.