Cheeky Couple Gifts

Classic SM.

"Oh, I like coming to the dentists. It's the only place where people actually ask me to spit!"

"O.K. I'm just feeding in your personal details for a suitable match..."

"I guess opposites do attract. She's a real shaker, and he's such a grind."

Advanced footsie

Inappropriate Snowmen

A Prickly Pair

'Don't blame me -- You're the one who had to have more personal space!'

'We met through a radiocarbon dating service.'

'I don't think my homework is very good. My dog refused to eat it.'

'Sure, but will you still love me when I bite off your head and eat it?'

"It's General Douglas MacArthur."

'Who has the rings and prenup?'

'Did you fart, sweetie?'

"Well, at first I didn't like him. But then his creepiness just grew on me."

Prison Romance.

"Blame the scientists who are teaching me sign-language Mum: It's not my fault if it's easier to learn the rude signs..."

'Here's one I made earlier.'

"Don't tell him anything."

'Would it make a difference if I told you I was listening to book on audio?'

'Silly thing, of course I still find you repulsive.'

'...And an extra packet of crackers! It's our Anniversary!'

'I know you love her and want to protect her. But it's wrong to laminate her.'

"I get that you're cold, but does he also have to eat all our meals with us?"

'Isn't it romantic, being married in the same alley where we first met eight months ago?'

Sticking out tongue

Lovers' Leap

'SAME SOCKS BAR.'

Cupid

Man visits palm reader with 'Doing Anything Tonight?' written on his hands.

'Quick, act like a dog. My friend just busted us.'

'Certainly you may come in for a drink. You live here.'

"Ahh, bless him. He's run out of bird feed for our little Blue Tits."