Cheeky Clucker Pillows

Hen Night

"Oh, I like coming to the dentists. It's the only place where people actually ask me to spit!"

'I don't think my homework is very good. My dog refused to eat it.'

"Quick swig first?"

'Listen up troop. We're going on a treasure hunt.'

"Blame the scientists who are teaching me sign-language Mum: It's not my fault if it's easier to learn the rude signs..."

Child praying - asks god to bless his family and the new motorbike he's bought with his father's credit card.

'How do people without a middle name know when the're in trouble?'

Sticking out tongue

"I do diet...between snacks."

'The arrows were more practical,,,,but I found these have a higher success rate,'

'Oxygen with that swimsuit ma'am?'

Thong World.

"Your dump or mine..?"

'Don't worry about a thing, my Mom doesn't believe in spanking.'

Footballer scores for the first time and wears T-Shirt reading: 'No longer a virgin.'

'He became an enthusiastic silver surger when he discovered there are nude ladies on the internet.'

'I promised my Dad I'd be home by ten but I didn't say if that was P.M. or A.M..'

Cheeky Boy

'I plucked myself. It reduces drag in the water.'

'Pint of Binge, please. . .'

"Which one had the health benefits in it?"

"Hey! Are you staring at my assets?!"

Before the smart phone there was the smart mouth.

'Look what I found, Dad - Can I keep her?'

Fisherman buying fish on the way home...!

I know you're keen to practise the new salsa routine, but I'm getting a bit jealous of the vacuum.

'Sorry, I'm not available. Please leave a message and I'll get back to you.'

Man tries to shake clinging dog off his leg. Dog says to another dog: 'I suppose you could say I'm a people person.'

"He's offered to show me the breast stroke - tonight in his water bed!"

Clean Fill Wanted

"By breaking the seal on this dress, you accept the terms and conditions printed on my panties."

'Have you a moment sir?...A: Yes; B: No; or C: Naff off?'