Cheeky Charmer Gifts

"By breaking the seal on this dress, you accept the terms and conditions printed on my panties."

'Have you a moment sir?...A: Yes; B: No; or C: Naff off?'

"Just popping next door to borrow a cuppa sugar."

Sticking out tongue

"I'm not wearing any thermal underwear."

"Your dump or mine..?"

"Oh, I like coming to the dentists. It's the only place where people actually ask me to spit!"

"Do you take anything off for cash?"

"A gorgeous redhead with a lovely smile."

"Talk back to me when i speak to you! And where's that evil little smirk I love?"

Clean Fill Wanted

Footballer scores for the first time and wears T-Shirt reading: 'No longer a virgin.'

'Hello? My eyes are down here.'

'I promised my Dad I'd be home by ten but I didn't say if that was P.M. or A.M..'

'Big Issue!'

It's the thought that counts! You devil!

Having noticed a hot-looking security woman, Mort quickly penned a note and stuck it in his briefcase.

'Are we going to allow that date to end that way? Hell no!'

'Look what I found, Dad - Can I keep her?'

'How about a date tonight?. . . Well, how about tomorrow then?'

'Take no notice -he thinks he's God's gift to lady bus drivers!'

'I don't think my homework is very good. My dog refused to eat it.'

This year Mike decides to make his own Valentine's cards.

"Why, Vicar, I'm Eve in the Garden of Eden, surely..."

"Blame the scientists who are teaching me sign-language Mum: It's not my fault if it's easier to learn the rude signs..."

'You're so nice and friendly that I've got nothing to moan about. That's a bit of cheek!'

'God, quick! Give me the gift of the gab.'

Man visits palm reader with 'Doing Anything Tonight?' written on his hands.

'The arrows were more practical,,,,but I found these have a higher success rate,'

"Have you ever licked cream off a woman's body?"

The Height of Impudence.

Boy about to poke a man from behid with a stick after having seen a pantomime

"Wanna chill at my place?"

Hot pink (and purple) monkey love!

"Hey-look, honey! We screwed our tails off!"