Checkout Wizard Gifts

'Bread, milk, cereal, sugar, sausage, potatoes, beans, biscuits. Click! So easy, but I do miss the sexy till lady.'

"This is not permanent...we'll be back as soon as things start to look up."

"We only got six days of funding."

"Although technically it's a profit and loss statement, the narrative is admittedly rather one-sided."

"My online account predicts the things I should own, then buys them with my credit card. It�s very convenient, but I do now need to move to a larger house."

'Today the stock market was moribund, as growth equities sputtered and bonds dipped due to the inverted yield curve. I'd translate that into layman's terms...but they don't pay me enough.'

Fred wonders if he should go see what's happening in accounting.

"Lovely dovetail."

Optical Illusion Supply Company.

'I'm afraid that the top investment banks are looking for more from job applicants than a 'Top Degree from the University of Hard Knocks'.'

"Tax evasion is like a cancer, it's growing exponentially!"

'Dad 'If Jack brought 10,000 shares at $3 and he sold 75% of them to Larry for $8 before the value went down to $2, what did Jack end up with?''

Cartoon about having many investors for crowd funding.

Targets.

'When I turned 18 something started happening to me every month. I started receiving a credit card bill.'

Waiting for retirement.

"Dad, wouldn't my allowance be better off earning interest in a tax free municipal bond fund?"

'Check with legal and find out -- maybe we're a non-profit.'

Convention for People Who Like to Attend Conventions.

"Says, property of the I.R.S."

"This pesky decimal point seems to give you quite a bit of trouble."

"And they say it's the safest 500-P/E stock out there."

"I still have my loophole, but I can't drive a truck through it."

'Man, I've bought heaps on my credit card this month...It always amazes me...How many things I'd rather have than money.'

'Let me through - I've a bargain for a nose!'

"...And this is Mable, who will assist me with the billing."

'You think he overheard my last lecture on tax code revision?'

'J.B., there's not enough ROI on the IPO, YTD.'

"Taxation, meet Representation."

'My mother sent down some chicken soup to see if that will help.'

"Yow! Thank goodness you've kept costs on a short leash!"

"I see you've arranged your life and business so that you can deduct everything. Do you know the penalty for 'trying to beat the system'?"