Chatty Companions Pillows

"You know, after all these years of giving you advice on all. Things personal and professional, it occurred to me that you've never actually asked for my opinion."

White Wine Wisdom (2)

"What I'd give for a stimulating conversation..."

"They haven't said two words to each other—it's sad... I hope we don't end up like that." "They keep talking to each other—it's exhausting... So glad we don't have to do that."

Text Culture

"He's sworn never to say Boudicca, ShrOwsbury, whoM, or narrative."

Time for tea and friendship.

"Honestly, Paula, I don't know what I'd do without our daily keggers."

Remember my mum? I took that photo a week before she died. There's one of me...that was a good haircut.

"John, wake up, I think the mattress has stopped breathing."

'Thank God it's Friday', thought the watercooler.

'There's a bench over there why not sit down and rest your weary mouth?'

Mark's new invention worked great for long car rides. '...And then she said,and then I said, and then she said to me...'

"Look at them smiling. They've reached their comfort zone."

"I'd appreciate a little more reacting to my ranting."

'Do you come here often?'

"I just want someone who texts me as often as Joe Biden does, you know?"

I conduct comprehensive surveys - I ask my girlfriend.

A guy tries his luck at the water cooler.

'It's a text from Mike - Sorry I'm L8 B THR in a crrrrassssssh!!! ARRRRGGGHHH....;p'

Communication

"Oh, she just wants attention or needs help."

"You just carpe, carpe, carpe."

Getting together to chew the fat.

'How did you cope before 24-hour rolling gossip?'

"Talk? Hell, after a few drinks you can't shut me up."

"Henpecked?! Don't get me started about being hen-pecked buddy!"

"So like, it's so cool to finally meet you in person."

"I can tell he likes me because he keeps butt-dialing me."

'I can't keep a secret, either!'

'No talking' sign at a fishing site.

'Why don't you come to my birthday party? It'll be a great place for networking...'

'If his old company was so great, why didn't he just stay there?'

Online Dating

"Good morning, world!"