Charisma Connoisseur Gifts

'Dogs have more charisma but cats have more electricity.'

Men gossiping

"Well, it's disappointing: Young Master seems to use the term 'best friend' for anybody who pays him the slightest attention..."

'Love me little, love me long.'

"I guess when your husband dies you'll really understand what they mean by a statistical death."

Atlas with the earth, says: 'So then I thought, Why not just roll the damn thing?'

'Father James, I slept with Father Henry from next parish... Is that a sin?' - 'Of course!! You belong to my parish!'

Counselor. It's annoying that he always has to have the second-to-last word

"No, no, that’s in a bar, Mr. President — you can talk politics and religion here."

"After two years of dating, we decided it was finally time to move in together."

"I like them. They hate the same things we do."

Man frozen in portrait pose.

Heaven

"Nope! He'd never set eyes on a water cooler in all his years in the office!"

"It says it's the vodka that's distilled twenty-nine times - they just can't seem to get it right."

Moliere

"We should probably talk about the elephant in the Roomba."

"I said, you know why women talk more than men?" "What?" "I said, you know why women talk more than men..." "What?"

Can I ask you a question, man-to-man? Sure, little buddy. What do "man-to-man talks" usually consist of? What? I've never really had one, I don't think. What usually goes into them? Sports? Shaving? Carburetors? A little of this, a little of that. There's a proper ratio, of course. I'm not good at math.

Charles Dickens.

"A trough full of food, mud to roll around in: Who cares if we can't fly..."

'But sinister gales - with that armour?'

C Day Lewis.

'Yeah, but this time she just said no -- there wasn't any hysterical laughter!'

White Wine Wisdom (2)

Bleak House

Bookshop: Our Bestsellers - Empty Phrases

'...and to commemorate 20 loyal years to the company, this gold plated sundial.'

"Hold that afterthought!"

"There's a kind of rhythm to making money that something inside me responds to."

"He says he's a Professor of Rhetoric but I'm not persuaded."

'You do obscenity very well. Can you talk without being obscene as well?'

"NOBODY LISTENS ANYMORE."

'This is our real-time chat room.'

Ben Foden Brings Flair and Adventure to the Party