Contentment Connoisseur Gifts

Fulfilment Centre.

"A trough full of food, mud to roll around in: Who cares if we can't fly..."

Bookworm Sleepover

"Are you not thinking what I'm not thinking?"

"Well, at least we know she died peacefully."

"This seat with extra legroom is great."

"OK, last time: Cado teak lounge chair from Denmark – me. Doggy bed – you."

"Well, it's disappointing: Young Master seems to use the term 'best friend' for anybody who pays him the slightest attention..."

"I'm afraid the price would make him toss and turn all night for months!"

"They remove people who have become 'jammed in armchairs' due to COVID 19 lockdown!"

'Idle' Home Exhibition

'Father James, I slept with Father Henry from next parish... Is that a sin?' - 'Of course!! You belong to my parish!'

"Can you take a video of me attacking the garbage so I can post it on Instagram?"

"After two years of dating, we decided it was finally time to move in together."

Second aid

'If content is king, why doesn't anybody want to pay for it.'

Pre-Winter Ennui-'Hon, did you have the furnace checked?'

"That will be the gold standard by which all other naps are judged."

Bats with blankets.

S**t Threw a Goose

"Wow, you look sexy today."

"They've got insulation to die for!"

"Just think how much we could save if we switched the heating off altogether."

"Thank you, Nathaniel. I think you, too, are a very scary young lawyer."

"... with a side of brown rice, right. And can the delivery guy stop at the pharmacy and pick up my prescription?"

"Don’t call the fire department — this is the most relaxed I’ve felt in years."

"You're stealing the blanket."

'Calm down darling... now what do you mean the tortoise has gone berserk?'

Brighter days are ahead. I love it when I hear that in both news and weather segments of the program.

Somebody should really be filming this for YouTube.

"Once again, nobody's happy A true whine-whine situation."

"According to our eye tracking studies,either nobody is looking at the content on our site, or all the participants have lazy eye."

'The fire seems to be drawing well.'

"I used to be a young crazy rebel like you you know."

Note to viewers: we've cut back on sexual content by replacing it with violence.