Chainsaw Whiz Gifts

"So long, boys. I'm off to the big city to try my hand at chainsaw sculpture."

Scene from 'Night of the Koala'

"Of course I know how to use a chainsaw!"

It appears to be some sort of computer virus.

'... and we're also having a sale on do-it-yourself emergency surgery kits.'

"So we've managed to consolidate all our multinational 24 hour hotline support centres down to one Single Point of Contact... and here he is."

Unbeknownst to many, the Frankenstein legend was in fact based on Albert Grimes, the mad tree surgeon.

Free Printer with Purchase of Ink

"I'll tell you how much wood I could chuck if I could—a lot, like, half a cord!"

"They didn’t warn us about this in our training"

'Still having problems finding day care?'

"Geez, Dude. I asked for a slight trim. Not a Brazilian wax."

"Al Gore happens to be a friend of mine."

Lumberjack Finds Strange Tree Rings

'There, THAT tree won't bother anyone anymore!'

"Extremely Minature Golf." They're playing golf down there today. A chlorophyll molecule is collecting green fees and some H2O molecules are a water hazard. The adrenaline group seems to have gotten a burst of energy -- They're playing through the slower groups in front of them. I see the electron is good, always a negative score. And the nucleus is a solid player, every shot is hit right down the center. But nobody can match the DNA's consistency --- He's able to perfectly replicate his s

"You've not used a chainsaw before have you?"

Lumberjack:'TIMBERRRR!' Tree:'MURDERERRRR!'

"It's okay. The chainsaw runs on biofuel."

'I wonder how many board feet are in this tree.'

Big Berts Brickmaking Academy

Ice Sculpting Class.

Chainsaw and Chair

"Now... shall we count YOUR rings..?"

The Best Defense for Trump's Wall

8th Annual Chainsaw Carving Competition

Incompetent gardeners cause havoc

Making Totem.

"I realise children are learning to use computers at an early age, but this is outrageous!"

"Darling, darling! Termites have found their ways into our food reserves!"

'Shears...loppers...chainsaw...'

Deforestation

"Of course he's old enough to cut the cake."

You B*****D

"I'm going to knock you on your Axe!!"