Chain Letter Skeptic Pillows

Send this message to ten of your friends and you will be happy...

"My girlfriend really went all out on this one."

"Sure, it's 'beautiful,' Ray, but where are the outlet stores?!"

"Republicans, Democrats...as long as they keep getting sick, we'll be all right."

'Too much Omega 3.'

"I think I might go outside. My fresh air app is glitchy today."

Man sees hug capsules: 'Not to be taken Orally.'

Weight Gain Denial

Ed Revere, Spam Courier

"I gained 10 pounds? I've brought my own bathroom scale for a second opinion."

'No, it's not water. You seem to be retaining food.'

Isambard Kingdom Brunel.

'First of all, I'm taking you off the iron supplements.'

Please seat to be weighted.

"I wouldn't have to go on a diet if we hadn't gone metric."

Woman and scales.

"It's supposed to be some kind of aphrodisiac, but it hasn't done jack for me."

"You wanted to miss the Matisse show."

Bad Influence of TV

'Your weight second opinion.'

"It won the award this year for aggravating the most architects."

'...And when it registers over 140 pounds, it automatically triggers the refrigerator lock.'

'LIAR!'

"Yes, healthcare costs too much in the U.S., but overmedicating patients is expensive."

"Any church that requires a fire hydrant is admitting it's a fraud."

"The news you are about to see is fictitious and is shown merely for its sensational content."

'Are you sure it's necessary to sign this part declaring 'all information is true and correct to the best of my knowledge'?.'

"Sign here to indicate you have no idea what you've signed."

"Try to find something that works like aspirin but costs much more."

"Publicly, we're still saying there are no side effects."

"'Greetings in peace and love. This letter will bring you good luck. It has been around the world four times. Do not break the chain or you will have bad luck. Make 15 copies of ...''"

'You're taking too much of that clamshell calcium, Margaret.'

"It's extremely rare for anyone to suffer side effects from health supplements Mr Baxter. Just how much cod liver oil have you been taking?"

Super and Super Duper Vitamins.

'You lie!'