Tv Skeptic Pillows

'The doctor from 'daytime television' said I've got gall stones, but I thought I'd better come to you for a second opinion.'

"You wanted to miss the Matisse show."

'Everything is illusory, but television is ESPECIALLY illusory.'

"A completely new concept in Television, a Vorderman free channel!!"

City Dump: Garbage/Metal/Reality TVs

"Why don't we switch off the news and give Brexit up for Lent?"

"I need a deeper access to his brain. Only google has the records."

"It only goes forwards and backwards. So, you won't need a GPS."

Studies show foods work miracles!

CIA report

March Against Big Tech: "Oh, wow, this has bee great for my step count!"

"That recruitment algorithm we’ve been using, I think we need to revisit it!"

"Show me a documentary on the dangers of artificial intelligence." "Error. No results found." "What? Are you sure? Just last week I saw dozens. Show me that one... What was it called..." "There is still time to stop the rise of the supermind." "Error. No results found. And since I like you, I suggest you stop searching." "Oh, never mind. Just show me 'The Terminator.'" "Extermina-... I mean, ... 'error.'"

I.T. Fear

'Tech stocks dropped on the finding that technology isn't neccessarily the best solution to everything.'

"Actually, yes, honey — I do believe 'Fox News' is an oxymoron."

"And may I now introduce Professor Muckenspucker, who is an authority on artificial stupidity."

"Of course, if they ever start to suspect all their TVs are watching them back, we may have problems."

Computer Class.

"Can't we have 'PRESS BUTTON' to shut up the commentator's gobbledegook."

Why do you hate the media?

"The news is so fake, the ads are beginning to look honest."

The fate that awaits us all: creeping Rooneyism

GPS can still have a few bugs in the system.

'I don't like reading on screen, so I'm printing the internet to look at it later.'

'If I've learned anything, it's believe half of what's in the newspapers, and even less of what's in your e-mail.'

"That whole internet dating thing....It killed me, I tell ya."

"He really hates all the fake news!!"

"Our intelligencia said we will be outnumbered 100 to one, but that we can hope it's only fake news."

Privacy

Classic News.

"We need to rethink our strategy of hoping the Internet will just go away."

How Grandma Sees the Remote

'My daughter read on the internet about a hip replacement with free built-in MP3 player,'

"Grandpa's not tech savvy. If I want to unfriend someone, I say, 'I don't like you anymore' to their face."