Chain Letter Skeptic Gifts

Send this message to ten of your friends and you will be happy...

"My girlfriend really went all out on this one."

"Sure, it's 'beautiful,' Ray, but where are the outlet stores?!"

"Republicans, Democrats...as long as they keep getting sick, we'll be all right."

Man sees hug capsules: 'Not to be taken Orally.'

"I think I might go outside. My fresh air app is glitchy today."

'Too much Omega 3.'

"I gained 10 pounds? I've brought my own bathroom scale for a second opinion."

Ed Revere, Spam Courier

Weight Gain Denial

'No, it's not water. You seem to be retaining food.'

Isambard Kingdom Brunel.

'First of all, I'm taking you off the iron supplements.'

Bad Influence of TV

"You wanted to miss the Matisse show."

"It's supposed to be some kind of aphrodisiac, but it hasn't done jack for me."

Please seat to be weighted.

"I wouldn't have to go on a diet if we hadn't gone metric."

Woman and scales.

'Your weight second opinion.'

"It won the award this year for aggravating the most architects."

"Yes, healthcare costs too much in the U.S., but overmedicating patients is expensive."

"Any church that requires a fire hydrant is admitting it's a fraud."

'LIAR!'

'Are you sure it's necessary to sign this part declaring 'all information is true and correct to the best of my knowledge'?.'

'...And when it registers over 140 pounds, it automatically triggers the refrigerator lock.'

"The news you are about to see is fictitious and is shown merely for its sensational content."

"Sign here to indicate you have no idea what you've signed."

"Try to find something that works like aspirin but costs much more."

"Publicly, we're still saying there are no side effects."

"'Greetings in peace and love. This letter will bring you good luck. It has been around the world four times. Do not break the chain or you will have bad luck. Make 15 copies of ...''"

"It's extremely rare for anyone to suffer side effects from health supplements Mr Baxter. Just how much cod liver oil have you been taking?"

'You're taking too much of that clamshell calcium, Margaret.'

Smart drugs. 'Gee, duh, I don't know. Does it look like we have any in stock?'

Super and Super Duper Vitamins.