Ceremony Skeptic Gifts

"I'm sorry, young man, I just can't go through with this ceremony!"

'No, but thanks for asking,'

"This is all so ARBITRARY!"

'She's a very protectice mother!' - Lifeguard at Christening/Baptism.

"We stumbled onto a house - and both of us being young and in love and quick to grasp the situation - "

"Oh, we're not religious. We only go on the solstices and equinoxes."

'Okay.. what the hell.'

'How about joining us for a soda and pizza after the ceremony?'

'So no animals were harmed in that movie...but how about the audience?!'

'I still say it was a mistake having the ceremony TOO close to his stag night!'

'What, They're comfortable.'

Double Wedding

'Charles Frederick and Camilla Gladys!'

'I know we had some good time together, Muriel, but a permanent relationship is out.'

"Well, really, there's nothing that would stop us from actually working. It's just tradition that has us drones lazing around."

Industry and Idleness - The industrious apprentice performing the duty of a Christian.

Marriage Returns

The most popular Sunday at St Clive's was always the annual 'Blessing of the Smartphones' service.

"In an effort to avoid controversy, and to accommodate our attention spans, we will be replacing the commencement speaker with fortune cookies."

Christening

'...I now pronounce you man and wife. You may assume the position.'

Things one would rather have left unsaid - 'I will!'

Martin is much gratified by an imposing ceremony

'No, the answer is: d ) All of the above.'

Mayor Gojo presents a keycard to the city to celebrity.

Rolling the red carpet before and after the important man

A bit of serious pantomime. - A message from the Lords.

"I'm not a fan of biblical movies."

"Is there a discount for someone who doesn't want to see the movie?"

Swearing a Child.

'We'd like to return it. There wasn't any on-screen chemistry between us.'

'Could I borrow your giant scissors for a minute? I cancelled payment on this giant check and I need to cut it up.'

"I do if she does."

'Will you love, honour, and share custody of the remote control so long as you both shall live?'

Snowboy becomes a Snowman.