Cell Phone Critique Pillows

"Hello? I can't talk right now! I'm on a plane! What?! No! Just leave some food in her dish! What?! I can't talk!"

'Man, times have changed.'

Dawing your Cellphone

Oh, the armor is state of the art

I'm Stupid (Damn Autocorrect)

Factory Recall Unicorn.

'Can't talk now, I'm just going into a tunnel.'

'This must be the Sea of Tranquility.'

'With this plan, you get Sit, Down, Stay and Rollover minutes.'

People crossing the street while texting use white canes.

"Though you be a villainous scoundrel, fairness demands I inform you that's your cell."

"Yes, I see where you left your phone."

'I'm getting mixed signals. First the boss tells me that I never really caught fire around here then he tells me that I suffer from burnout.'

"What I did during my summer vacation with my mom's 1,000 free minutes..."

"Use your phone once more during dinner...And I'll send you close-ups of my patients' wounds."

"After he got his cell phone, I'm only his second-best friend!"

Emojis for psychos.

"The killer was calling from inside the house and didn't even bother to text first."

"Do you mind?! I happen to be on the phone!"

People Don't Talk to Each Other Anymore!

This one's the best plan for you... No charges for roaming outside of your neighborhood and if you do lots of tricks, it includes over 1,000 sit, stay and rollover minutes.

'Please turn off your cell phone. We can't afford to be startled.'

'That's called the 'Mask of Tragedy.' Otherwise known as the last person whose cell phone rang during the opera!'

Award: Most trivial phone app. Ah-choo! Gesundheit!

Customer service involves giving your clients your undivided attention.

Girls (and Boys) on Film

More and more people around the world are asking to be buried WITH their mobile phones, in case of a premature burial...

Stoplight

'He ain't texting, Boss...'

'Please call customer services for assistance with your enquiry.' - 'Gah. Useless website!' - 'Press '1' for sales. Press '2' for customer service.' - '2' - 'Please visit our website at...' - 'Oh, you did not just say that!'

'The only thing he brought back from Earth is their annoying cell phone technology.'

Handy Pre-made Notes for Modern Life

Quantity over quality

Etiquette and the mobile phone - "Oh hi. I'm on a training course."

"I did all my homework last night. I couldn't find my phone."