Cellphone Critique Pillows

People crossing the street while texting use white canes.

Dawing your Cellphone

Oh, the armor is state of the art

I'm Stupid (Damn Autocorrect)

Factory Recall Unicorn.

'This must be the Sea of Tranquility.'

"Though you be a villainous scoundrel, fairness demands I inform you that's your cell."

"Use your phone once more during dinner...And I'll send you close-ups of my patients' wounds."

'I'm getting mixed signals. First the boss tells me that I never really caught fire around here then he tells me that I suffer from burnout.'

"After he got his cell phone, I'm only his second-best friend!"

"Hello? I can't talk right now! I'm on a plane! What?! No! Just leave some food in her dish! What?! I can't talk!"

Emojis for psychos.

"The killer was calling from inside the house and didn't even bother to text first."

"Do you mind?! I happen to be on the phone!"

Support SABA - the society for the abolition of acronyms...

People Don't Talk to Each Other Anymore!

'That's called the 'Mask of Tragedy.' Otherwise known as the last person whose cell phone rang during the opera!'

'Mr. Clark will text you now.'

Stoplight

Girls (and Boys) on Film

"This isn't a sales call? Aren't all calls, in the final analysis, sales calls?"

Damn, cell phone!

Customer service involves giving your clients your undivided attention.

Award: Most trivial phone app. Ah-choo! Gesundheit!

'Please call customer services for assistance with your enquiry.' - 'Gah. Useless website!' - 'Press '1' for sales. Press '2' for customer service.' - '2' - 'Please visit our website at...' - 'Oh, you did not just say that!'

'The only thing he brought back from Earth is their annoying cell phone technology.'

Quantity over quality

Handy Pre-made Notes for Modern Life

Etiquette and the mobile phone - "Oh hi. I'm on a training course."

"I did all my homework last night. I couldn't find my phone."

'Here's my number. Have the gentleman call me when he wishes to order.'

"Congratulations, you've broken our record for remaining on hold the longest...As a reward we're cutting you off so you can get on wit the rest of your day."

Why's the phone off the hook?

I'm sorry, but my do-not-call list includes telemarketers, political organizations, charities and men named Fusco.

Cell phones