Celestial Map Reader Gifts

"If you get to the pitchfork-shaped cloud, you've gone too far."

Road sign: "Good Start, but you've still got a ways to go."

You Are Here

Man painting over a 'You are here' sign.

'BANG' and a cosmology institute appears.

'Never mind that. I think I've just discovered a new planet!'

'AHH, here it is! At the next intersection, turn left, then cough, following that, turn right, then cough...' WHEN DOCTORS NAVIGATE.

"Stupid map ... that dot must cover 10,000 cubic light years."

"Our detractors call it suburban sprawl, but I prefer thinking of our plan as 'sustainable over-development!'"

'Well if I'm so 'bloody useless' perhaps you'd better read the map!'

'Oh man, we are so lost...!'

"Well what does the GPS say?"

Having been born with a birthmark that looks exactly like Asia and the Mideast, Russell was able to ace the geography portion of the SATs.

Excess Baggage: By the time the male of the species admits he is lost. It is generally too late.

Right, this is the map of all the UFO sightings. Hold the light steady love.

'It was only 500 yds across but as he visualised the GPS blind spot the risks seemed immense.'

The Big Tipper

"According to the map, the treasure should be right behind that door."

"That's the last time I buy a dog from a cartoonist."

"This connect the dots is taking FOREVER!"

'Typical man - why can't he just ask for directions?'

Leaving a Real Impression: That's one small step for (a) man, one giant leap for mankind.

"I told you it was a book you couldn't put down."

'Of course the Johnsons got the big cloud.'

The Huge-Underground Vat theory of why all wonton soup tastes exactly the same.

"According to the map, we should be nearing the North Pole, but something tells me we’ve been reading the map upside down."

'I told you not to rely on the sat-nav.'

Can I have a look at the map?

"I think I found a location for our vacation."

'Sorry I'm late everybody,I got lost.'

'It doesn't show it on this map....'

'Are you going exploring or retrieving a duck?'

Geography class - UR Here.

"And up ahead is a place called, 'portage'."

An explorer sees a sign in the jungle, which reads: 'You wiil be here'.