Map Reader Gifts

'My wife insisted I stop and ask someone for directions. Could you just pretend you're giving them to me?'

Road sign: "Good Start, but you've still got a ways to go."

You Are Here.

Information: EWE ARE HERE.

'Well, that makes two of us. I'm lost too.'

'So it's the Red Lion, followed by the Rose and Crown, and then on to the Horse and Hounds.'

Lab rat in maze, sees 'you are here' map.

"The podiatrist's is right over there ... in the foothills."

Rain forest: 'You are here - tomorrow you will be here'

'Call yourself a mountain guide?'

"Sorry... My School Aversion Syndrome is totally bad today."

'I'm sure the people who live around here will know where we are.'

'Excuse me - Which way is Southwestern North Carolina?'

'While your thoughtful analysis is always appreciated, I'd rather see you grab a spoon and help dig.'

'Are you going exploring or retrieving a duck?'

"So it's left at the staple, then just follow this long crease."

'Exactly what the forecast on telly.'

Can I have a look at the map?

"I can't believe this! Even with a map, you can't find the cemetery!"

Recalculating!

Traveller with a globe on the front of his car.

The nearest big city? Let's see, probably head north to St Louis... 'No, no, no, Memphis is closer...'

Nicky had a feeling that they had missed the turn off for Route 66 and somehow ended up on Route 69.

"Do you get the feeling we're being watched?"

"I don't care what the map says, this isn't Sheffield."

Confusing Road Signs: Next 250 MI

You are Here

"I'm glad someone knows where we are, cos I haven't got a clue."

"Well Carter, according to the map, this is where the Rainforest begins."

You're Here. Man, You Really Look Like An Idiot!

Worst case scenario of asking for directions...

"We must be in the Village."

"That's the last time I buy a dog from a cartoonist."

"...It's about 11 miles west on Brandon Gap Road, then five miles around Lake Dunmore...or three weeks as the easily distracted crow flies."

You Are Lost