Map Reader Extraordinaire Gifts

Racing pit crew member holds sign for driver: Stop And Ask For Directions.

'Now we'll never find that buried treasure.'

Right, this is the map of all the UFO sightings. Hold the light steady love.

'Hello. I'm looking for G Street.'

'Are you sure that's the right map?'

You Are Here

Road sign: "Good Start, but you've still got a ways to go."

Man painting over a 'You are here' sign.

A treasure map shows you all the roads without tolls.

QUINTUPLE BYPASSES EXPLAINED.

"Damn. I think I missed the turn for Bethlehem."

Here be dragons.

"I want to dispel the rumor that this redistricting map was drawn by my toddler on an Etch-A-Sketch. . .I'd never met that toddler before."

Meet the Enemy

'Why can't you admit you're lost?'

"A journey of a thousand miles begins with a MAP, actually."

Mall Directory: You aren't here x - where the heck are you?

'AHH, here it is! At the next intersection, turn left, then cough, following that, turn right, then cough...' WHEN DOCTORS NAVIGATE.

"Stupid map ... that dot must cover 10,000 cubic light years."

An alien in his space ship sees a space sign that says 'You are here'

The Lost World: You are Here

Songs about Texas, next 1100 miles.

"Our detractors call it suburban sprawl, but I prefer thinking of our plan as 'sustainable over-development!'"

'Oh man, we are so lost...!'

'Well if I'm so 'bloody useless' perhaps you'd better read the map!'

"Well what does the GPS say?"

Having been born with a birthmark that looks exactly like Asia and the Mideast, Russell was able to ace the geography portion of the SATs.

Excess Baggage: By the time the male of the species admits he is lost. It is generally too late.

You are here.

'You mean to tell me you forgot where you buried dinner?'

The Map of the Human Heart

"I've always wanted an empire of Distance Learning Campuses."

'It was only 500 yds across but as he visualised the GPS blind spot the risks seemed immense.'

Shaped Much Different: Vietnam and Afghanistan.

"According to the map, the treasure should be right behind that door."